Hello dear imaginary reader, I apologize for the little break in posting. During the remainder of our time in Canmore I decided that if time alone did not present itself, that I would be present - not taking time out to post but to enjoy our location and time together. I am very happy with my choice, a big thank you to our friends Sweet Thing and her husband Bondman for sharing their beautiful condo with us. Xoxo! That said, there is nothing like being home...ahhhh...your own bed and pillow, puppy snuggles and routine. I love a good routine! I had mentioned in an earlier post that our family had been on a western adventure over a decade ago, this trip, some of that adventure was revisited. As our time in the Banff/Canmore area began to count down we decided to head to the Lake Louise area. To us, as beautiful as Lake Louise is, Moraine Lake takes the cake, You may remember dear imaginary reader that Lake Moraine and her Seven Peaks were the image on the back of the old paper Twenty Dollar Canadian Bill. From Moraine we headed to Lake Louise where the parking gods shined upon us! We were able to snag a spot on site, no shuttle for us....it was decision time. My hip had been a little sore from the stairs at Moraine (I forgot to mention we witnessed an engagement there, so fun!), I wasn’t sure that it would allow me to do the Tea House Hike. Our last visit here oh so very long ago found my young gazelles running up the trail while TLOMIL took his time and I am sure all of his patience to coax me up the trail. Ya see, I have a wee bit of a thing with heights. Makes no sense to me, throw me in a hot air balloon, a helicopter no biggie. Put me in a car doing switchbacks or walking near the edge of a trail and I am a big scaredy cat. With a prod from LLB, and the help of the lovely walking sticks I had received as a Christmas gift from Teach and AI, I decided to give it a go. The hike begins at the beautiful Fairmont Lake Louise and slowly but surely switchbacks (YIKES) its way up to the Agnes Lake Tea House. The Tea House itself was built in 1901 by the Canadian Pacific Railway as shelter for hikers. The elevation gain of the hike is 400 m (1,312 ft), when you get to the Tea House you are at an altitude of 2135 m (7005 ft). What the heck was I thinking? Thin air, 11 years after the first painful hike with a bad hip and wonky ankle! WTF!?!? With a “come on Ma, you got this” from LLB, we - LLB her Scott and I headed further up the trail. My love took position on the patio of the Fairmont to work the phone and not stress his knee. Did I mention that the volume of people on the trail was crazy? There were very few times when you weren’t having someone pass you, some were three abreast (promise not to rant!) which would push us over to the side, err edge! I am very sure that there were multiple times when the poor Scot could hear me shake I was so nervous. LLB and Scot were gentle and supportive of me, encouraging breaks and allowing others to pass so I didnt have to stay close to the edge. I wont say that I was a speed merchant but together - we got ‘er done! We met Scooter and KnowMe at the Tea House. LLB and I hung around for a bit, I was dehydrated and experiencing low sugars by the time we made it to the Tea House, so had to hydrate and eat a bit before we could head down. The others took off like the gazelles they are and headed to the Bee Hive before working their way back to the Fairmont patio. LLB and I stopped along the way down to take some pics and marvel in the beauty of where we were. Somehow while looking out on the vista we were able to tune out the parade of people behind us. We chatted our way back stopping now and then for messages from TLOMIL “when will you be back, this flight of scotch is tasteing like another!” Or the next one “You are driving home”, the odd one from Teach asking questions. We debated answering but in a weird way were able to share when they weren’t with us. In the end, I now know that I very much enjoyed using the walking sticks. I did not enjoy wearing the Boys old back pack, too big, too hot. I need to pick up a breathable day pack. I learned that pushing my hip, within reason is worth it (thanks be for ibuprofen). The very best thing - any one on one time I can get with any of my kids is worth what ever it takes to get it ( I may regret stating this in black and white)
At the end of the hike we took our position on the patio with TLOMIL while waiting for Scotter, KnowMe and the Scot. Lovely duck confit wraps shared with LLB and a wee glass of processo and I was ready for our next adventure! Cheers, dear imaginary reader
1 Comment
I must begin this new blog post with a big thank you to those of you that chose to loose the invisible cloak and reach out to me regarding my last post WHY? It restores my faith in women - heck people - to know that I am not alone. I have made a point to say something nice to a complete stranger since then, when I feel it is appropriate. Yesterday when out exploring with the love of my immediate life, LLB and her Scot, our family friend Scooter and his girlfriend KnowMe I saw a server wearing an amazing pair of black boots that had been embroidered with colorful flowers. I took two seconds to share that I thought they were amazing! When I got back home I thought damn! Should have asked her where she got them....two seconds to do that. I was smiling as I shared and she beamed while saying thank you. So easy.....lets keep the good vibes rolling dear imaginary reader. As mentioned above, we were out seeing the sights yesterday, we made a decision to head out to the furthest places we wanted to see then on subsequent days we would not have to travel as far. First stop for us was the Spiral Tunnels, the engineering of this over 100 years ago, still fascinates me t. We did have a bit of a wait but on such a beautiful day, it was lovely to stand and people/forest watch while we waited. The trains here in the west are super long, some 1 or 2 kilometers long. If you take a good look at the pic below you can see a train car close to the bottom right corner. Follow the cars going into the tunnel up on the left....the bottom car is part of the train heading into the tunnel. Now, if you look carefully you can see train cars in the middle of the picture. That is the engine and the front cars of the same same train coming out of the tunnel while end of the train is no where near entering the tunnel! I know, I know you probs have to be there to be excited, and I will lay claim to being a geek, but if you get the chance dear imaginary reader check it out! Our next stop took us to Takakkkaw Falls in YoHo National Park, this too is among the highlights for our family, it is great to be able to share the experience with new people. The road in in a windy one through the forest, avalanche areas are easily seen. Switch backs to scare the heck out of you while another car (or bus!! YIKES) heads your way. There is a lovely waterfall called “Where the Waters Meet”, where water from the YOHO meets the water from Kicking Horse Pass, one grey one blue. Very powerful water... By the time we made it to the main attraction we were all more than a wee bit hot, thankfully you can easily cool off Our next stop was Emerald Lake and then Natural Bridge, each were enjoyed by the “kids” After an amazing meal once again at Truffle Pigs is Field (this is another must if you are in the area), we headed back to Canmore. It was a quiet ride, a few sleepers along the route. Me, well I was proud that I had made it through the day without loosing my sh*t. Seems to be a bit of a recurring theme for me lately.
Ok, Ok, yeah, yeah, yeah....I know that I am blessed to be able to things that I do. The most basic of which is go outside where ever I want (in general terms) and when ever I want. I try to be a good sharer of space no matter where I am. I do not leave garbage, I will pick up garbage that I see (any of our family and I am sure yours do this). I try my best to not take anything into an area that really doesn’t need to be there...not dragging my cooler with me through a sight seeing area - we an go back and get it when we are ready to eat. I am not wearing a 45 pound backpack that I am clearly not used to wearing and I turn around in a crush of people unaware of the space that I consume and take out kids and others with said backpack. I don’t push my bike, front wheel up through a crowded farmers market when free bike check with security is provided. I try to be specially aware and don’t leave my grocery cart deserted in the middle of a grocery isle so I can run back to get something I forgot, or take up the whole front of a shelf or freezer with my whole cart so no one else can get access. Then there is my alllllllll time favorite - sitting in my seat at a Jays game, and the person beside me is a guy with “man spread” for two and pushes or oozes (YUCK!!!) into my space. Usually this position is also completed while wearing a baseball hat along with the guy in front of him. A hat who’s position is moved several times in a game without giving consideration to those surrounding them whose sight line of said game is now obstructed! Whew! I will now step down from my soapbox. The Jillie rant is over perhaps now I have regained some composure and am up to fight the going out in public fight for another day! Does this bother you as well dear imaginary reader? Yesterday found the love of my immediate life and I driving into Banff to have a little soak in the Upper Hot Springs, it is something that we both enjoying doing when we are in the vicinity of any natural Hot Spring to be honest. There is just something about it - now you already know about my nightly soak history dear imaginary reader but this is different.
Perhaps it begins with the historical nature of the location and the building itself - the feel of the soft warm water wrapping you in imagined safety and healing....Banff Upper Hot Springs is the highest operating Hot Spring in Canada at 5,200 feet (hot springs.ca). The gift store has souvenirs where you can purchase bathing suits both of current fashion and historical suits. The building where you enter the Hot Springs is a renovated historical building. It is easy to conjure up an image of people as my kids would say “back in the day” enjoying time in the spring in their fashionable suits..coming up the hill by horse and buggy. Yesterday we were able to get a parking spot fairly close so TLOMIL didnt have far to walk up hill with his bum knee, the Hot Spring was bout 1/4 full. Lots of space to float or stand, easy to grab a jet to blast what ever sore spot you had. Bright, warm sun shining on your face...eyes closed, feel the steam...ahhhhhh. Heaven. There were people of all shapes and sizes - but all we could hear was English being spoken. I found this to be strange - normally our apres soak convo involves discussing the number of languages we heard. I hopped up on the edge to cool off a bit , enjoying one of our family past times, people watching. There were people of all ages, a cute toddler in their swimming diaper practsing jumping into the “kiddie pool” with a grin from ear to ear when ever they were able to “stick” their landing. A group of older men sitting in a line having a serious political conversation - a group of tweens taking selfies of each other with a shared IPhone through the plastic cover of a dry bag. There were a number of women enjoying their soak in shorts and tee shirts. My favorites where the women of my vintage, some skinny, some my size or bigger. As I cooled on the side and thought to myself, good for you ladies for having the confidence to feel awesome and secure in a two piece bathing suit I overheard three early twenty year old ladies to my right discuss the same ladies I was thinking of. The opinions they had were far different than my own. The were comparing their own bikini clad bodies with those of the older ladies - down to length of their torso, width of thighs - what where the older generation thinking wearing these suits - just look at their breasts!!! It took everything within me to listen to the imaginary voices of my girls in my head telling me that this was not the place to loose my shit. Why?? I mean seriously, why do we women do this to each other? WHY??? I wish that I could tell you that I have never done this dastardly thing, but that would be a big fat lie. I have compared myself to other women, but in my case generally, I come up lacking. Why is it that for the most part it seems that we look for flaws in each other instead of seeing the positive? Why do we do this at all? Is this behavior something men do? If not, then why don’t they? Why is it that women feel they have to be taller, skinnier, color their hair, dress appropriately? Most men I know are happy if they comb their hair and match (though there are a couple that have no freaking concept of what the word “match” even means hahah). Ooohhh maybe that was mean.... I ended up having a conversation with the younger ladies, easy for me to talk to strangers than those I know, none the less a baby step backward on the tightrope I think. I promise Teach and LLB that I said nothing about my thoughts about their conversation, though on second thought perhaps I should have. TLOMIL and I left the Hot Springs to wander about downtown Banff. A beauty day with mountains as the back ground. We came upon the weekly Farmers Market, found some yummy food, Gin (WOOT), and lovely people. While there, I again overheard a group of ladies criticizing one of the vendors appearance. Why? So dear imaginary readers, I challenge you to stop criticizing and start supporting. Let’s start actually telling the man or woman something positive...lift people up instead of cutting them down. Let’s change the “Why” are we criticizing to “Why are we not” handing out a complement . Learning how to accept support and compliments is somehthing that I am not good at, I am sure that many of you dear imaginary readers aren’t either. A couple of weeks ago a friend shared her support of me with me, I said thanks and quickly changed the subject. I was uncomfortable, and I should not have been. Shoulda grabbed her up in a hug and said thanks. Let’s get good at giving and receiving. Hey dear imaginary reader - thanks for taking the time to find me. To read my thoughts, fears and dreams. You make my day! Before the boy headed off to College in the States just over a decade ago (what the heck!) our family took a trip to the west of Canada, this was our kids first trip on a plane. We had some great trips before that, but we were and still are lovers of a good road trip. When you have 3 kids in travel sports it takes a lot of your fun money to keep it going.
For that initial trip west we decided to show them the highs and the lows of travel - over the top and reasonable, we shared the cost with them so it was fun as well as a bit of a life lesson. That trip was my first trip west, the love of my immediate life had lived in British Columbia as a kid and had been there for work so nothing new to him. We rented condos in Vancouver and in Victoria. Blew our brains out and stayed in a suite at the Wickaninnish Inn in Tofino (worth every penny), where Teach was both blown away and nervous when the staff knew her name when she walked in the door. We also had a family learn to surf lesson while we were there, this after whale watching in Victoria where we were blessed to see many Orca breeches. I often wondered if the kids thought of those whales when we were out learning to surf. There is a picture of all of us in our wet suits and I promise you will never have to see it dear imaginary reader! From Tofino we headed for a night in Whistler with a funny dinner at the Keg..though not sure if the boy found the whole thing humorous as there was a bit of fun at his expense. From there a beautiful drive to Jasper where we fulfilled, at least for one night, a childhood dream of TLOMIL and stayed in a cabin at a resort we labeled the Poca Dontis. We found ourselves in a cabin that had yet to be renovated, there had been flooding a few weeks earlier. Let’s just say this, we had to put toilet paper in the gap around the door and spray it with Off in hope of not being carried away by the mosquitos! The extremes from Tofino to Jasper..... Next stop was the awesome Banff Springs Hotel where we were upgraded (there are hotel fairies!!) to the A.C. Leighton Suite. I now find myself just down the road in Canmore enjoying the hospitality of dear friends who have loaned us their condo for a couple of weeks. Today my love and I stopped into the Banff Springs Hotel and relived a bit of our trip with the kids. While it was a wonderful experience, it is wonderful to travel with just my love for a bit. It is something we don’t often do, something we should do more. I had a massage the first day in Canmore with a lovely lady named Judy - boy she had magic hands! She began the massage by sharing that women our age don’t take time for ourselves often enough. There is always something to do, someone to look after and I should relax and enjoy my hour. I came out of there a wet noodle - and a mind set to enjoy this week with my love- to have the two of us take care of each other. Looking forward to LLB and her Scot coming out next week along with other friends but cheers to self care and couple time! I plan on spending a little time right close to this chair, listen to the birds, watch the light change on the Three Sisters and just breathe.... If only the flies on the wall in this house could talk, oh my the stories they could tell you! There is no subject that is off limits here, in fact there never has been. A time and place, at times for sure not age appropriate - but as we raised our children we did our best to teach them about honesty and respect. The golden rule, the things and perhaps a few other tidbits that “normal” parents did not feel comfortable with dear imaginary reader. One thing that we tried and failed at is only being positive about weight and image. Our kids and I (for a second a million years ago) were athletes, movement has always been our happy place. TLOMIL had a knee injury fairly young that limited what he could do to “play”. It has always been a bit of a joke around here that both girls were successful in their chosen sports to the Provincial or National Level. The boy, not so much. Though he did get a bit of a ride to go to College down south (ok, north from us but try to explain that one to an American, just sayin”), and went on to play hockey in Australia and France. Staying active while adulting for some is difficult. This is where my hand raises and I am doing the old elementary school oooohh ahhh pick me pick me! I have had my excuses, difficult to find time for me while the kids were small, too busy with the kids during the school crazy sports years. Of course there was that whole thing of gainful employment thrown into the mix to add yet another layer to the I want to but just cant find the time mix. My throwing myself into my kids lives 150% was the right thing to do at the time. I am very proud to say that I believe that we have strong, loving, honest (sometimes perhaps to honest) relationships. But I have shown them some wrong ways along our journey as well. Now dear imaginary reader we know that for almost a year now I have been struggling with back and hip issues, while I have had to be careful and I have over done it, they perhaps turned into yet another excuse for me. For the past few weeks mulching, weeding, canoeing and so on, I have been pushing the old envelope and have survived. In fact I believe just a smidgin flourished, now dont go crazy there is still plenty of fluff here to de fluff but progress has been made. (Did you hear the sound of the cork popping!?) All of us are trying to move and get healthier whether by going to a trainer, using an app on our phones or just moving more in life. I had a conversation with LLB a little while ago about the benefits of taking before, during and after shots to check your progress through what can be tourture. For me, the torture begins at the first shot - would not want to look at that sucker if my life depended on it. I suggested that perhaps instead of photos to begin with she start by taking her measurements. By no means is LLB fluffy just not as “tight” as she was last year as she trained for and ran her first half marathon. Adulting can do that to you right dear imaginary reader? So, as she says she “no longer wants to be a skinny fat girl”, I know she and her app will make it so - and PDQ as my Mom would say. I think I made a mistake. This week I took a couple of before and after shots of my back garden... Ya know what? I didn’ want to peek at that either. Looking at that reminded me of all the sweat, bites, aches and pain - oh the hours it would take to get this right! But then I sucked it up and got it done. Its not perfect but its better - just like LLB and I will be when we put the work in. It makes me feel proud when I look at these shots as I rub antinflammatory cream into my hip and tush! These photos show why I was wrong, you can remember but seeing is better my dear imaginary reader. LLB, the next time I see you we are going to break out the camera and get this party started, we have a wedding to get ready for kid!
Well hey there dear imaginary reader, I hope your week has been a fun filled as mine has!
I haven’t shared with you yet about a couple of really cool things that have been happening here in the middle of nowhere lately, and they have been keeping me busy this week. First of all a couple of months ago DC and the boy got engaged, that’s right, I am going to be MOG! It is very exciting for our families, I am happy to share that LLB, Baby girl and I were invited to go dress shopping last night. It was so much fun and of course DC looked amazing in everything she tried on. At one point we three girls and DC’s Mom and soon to be SIL had a group cry..we got poor DC going as well. Yes folks, I am a big cry baby looking for a place to happen, its true, I admit it. Point two is this - several weeks ago Baby Girl asked me why her name was what it is in this Blog - my response “well it is your position in the family”. We agreed I would change her name to one more fitting “the grown ass woman that I am Mom” when she got a job. Low and behold - Baby Girl has morphed into Teach! Yes sir - got her first real live teaching job to begin this fall. So exciting, so proud of her! Another note which makes me happy for strange reasons is that the love of my immediate life has decided (for a little while at least) to become unretold! He is having fun working out some business issues for a company and that makes his heart sing most days. I like it because I can accomplish what ever I want, when ever I want around here. I have actually had the bed to myself for a couple of days, its been great! Now just between me and you I am ready for him to come home..... This week has also brought on the task of proof reading letters for LLB as she applies for a position to article. My fingers and toes are crossed for her - she will be an amazing lawyer. The gardens are coming along, I thought today that as a gardener I will never be happy. I had to remind myself that it is only the first pass through my back gardens this year, I need to be happy with better and not perfect. I guess I could say that about more than just my gardens. I shared a couple of pictures on Instagram yesterday, they are coming along. It has been brutal working in this heat, but it has to be done before we get going on more mulch. Ya know, it seems only yesterday that I was struggling getting the new car seat hooked on to a grocery cart while wrangling the two older kids. Now, they are all moving forward, a good thing but perhaps a tad unsettling for me as well. It’s a bit of a maze but then...I like puzzles dear imaginary reader. I leave you with a picture of Oli, he who only wants to come in when he is good and ready these days... Before I head out to the garden today I wanted to put todays musings in black and white. I have learned through the weeks that I have been writing this blog that getting things down itruly helps me work through what ever is on my mind. Yes, I will haul more mulch today, weed and for sure hop in and out of the pool while working away in this heat wave. Our plan had been the new roof and roof windows for this years maintenance plan for our house in the middle of nowhere. Next year was to be some redecorating, you know, painting, blinds - perhaps some new furniture and adding the built ins that I want in our family room.
With the new roof windows comes the need to caulk the inside of the new roof windows before winter. Having to caulk our family room roof windows means renting equipment to get up there, something we only want to do once. At some point we had forgotten to crank the old windows closed and it rained causing drip marks down the wall, that has to go while we have the chance. Also on the ceiling on the other wall for some reason we have moisture marks. They appeared after a cold spell a couple of years ago. No idea why, even the love of my immediate life and HB have no idea. That will mean drywall cut, investigation and patching. All leading to painting....see the theme? So, if we are painting is this the time to add the built in’s by the fireplace? What CAN we do when the sides are uneven? I do not have a clue dear imaginary reader. I have been on Pinterest, some beautiful pictures but I haven’t seen anything that looks like our family room. The new roof windows are solar powered, no more reaching over the edge of the loft to crank them open. No more holes in screens from said crank, WOOT WOOT!! And they have blinds! Blinds mean we will have to replace the sheers that are currently on the windows.....this has the potential to turn into a whole room make over. Last weekend when I was discussing this with LLB, the only thing she said was “ya mean this room won’t be green anymore?”. We moved into our home 17 years ago this year. It was a stretch for us coming from that community to the west of us with the little side split, into a way larger house that needed a ton of work. My dear friend Nancy had the decorating gene, one I don't have. Our family room is the last room that still has most of what she did for us in it. The make do IKEA shelves and side tables that were only supposed to be there “until”. Seventeen years later .....An oil leak was found about a year after we moved in - the family room was virtually destroyed- it was awful. But it was put together again just as it was. Its time to change it up. I am going to head out to the garden now to think about things. If you have any ideas dear imaginary reader pass them along, I’m going to need all the help I can get. Happy Canada Day! I am not sure exactly at which point over that past weekend LLB suggested, nah, told me that she wanted to see some real talk in the blog. “You know Ma, the way to talk to us”, I asked her for an example, she thought for a bit and tried to explain but I was not picking up what she was throwing down. LLB would try to look for an example during our time together, alas, I was never provided with one - not sure if that is good or bad. But as my “kids” would say, Imma gonna give it a try!.
Yesterday I was heading out for a lunch with my amigas in Effortown and thought I would take a selfie and if I felt good about it I was going to share it here today. Look dear imaginary reader, no photo. I sent it along to my girls with the caption “WOOF”. I thought I looked terrible. My hair is in desperate need of a good cut (already scheduled, not that had any influence on my mind set), I had bags under my bags, a combination of lack of sleep and allergies (perhaps it IS time to see the MD and get those allergy tests). As my mother would have said, I looked like something that the cat dragged in. The girls responded with “Ma, you are too hard on yourself”. Shortly after this, as I checked my watch sitting in traffic worrying about being late for lunch I noticed the date and everything clicked into place. This week is always a bad week for me - well at least for over 20 years. This week is the anniversary of my mothers death. I know it happened on a single day, but over the years I have come to accept that the whole week is difficult on me. Instead of allowing myself to feel the pain and sorrow I turn to feeling bad about myself. I as sit here drenched in sweat from moving even more mulch, aching hip, sore back and trying to hold back the tears (which is kinda not working) - its real time. My siblings and I had a very cool, hard working Mom. She could party like a rock star drinking water and taking your keys so you couldn’t drive home from our house. She was a devil on a snowmobile. Loved nothing better that gathering a bunch of people and cooking for them and having a few laughs. Don’t even get me started about playing euchre. Its hard to find anyone to play with these days. Going to a family reunion with Mom and her side of the family was confusing as hell, the people I was related to and how? She lost a son and held herself together for the rest of us. Valiantly fought a hereditary disease for years, almost from when I was born, until it finally won. Oh she could be stubborn, set in her ways. But a chat and some J&B and you could sort things out with her. When her grandchildren came along - they were the light of her life. So today, I’m going to suck it up, take the necessary meds and get going on this )_*)(**( mulch, just like she would. Tonight, a few of our kids and the love of my life and I are going to hang out with friends that we have not seen in 17 years. We will watch their son perform live.....so exciting! The pic I am posting below is not the best of my Mom, but it is real life from the town to the west of us. My pic of it is kinda off kilter, kinda like the fun side of my Mom was. With her - the lights of her life. Make the most of each and every day dear imaginary reader Hello dear imaginary reader, as I had mentioned on earlier posts our family had a big weekend. Part of the fun was that Silly, one of Baby Girl’s roommate’s was able to head down from the nation’s capital to play with us. As Miss Silly was dragged into eastern antics with KB and I over the years, it was only appropriate that she begin her weekend with an overnight and road trip to Efforttown with K and PB. I am told it was a fun start to a good weekend. We all survived the epic party, Sunday again as noted earlier was a slow one. Lots of people taking it easy and I played Mom cooking, cleaning and take care of everyone, one of my favorite things in the world! Yesterday as it was time for everyone else to head out to work, I got to spend alone time with Silly - something that I had never had the privilege of doing before. I prepared the pool early in the morning so she could have a quick swim, Ollie going on his frog hunt every morning is his favorite way to start the day. I must get one of those “frog logs” soon. Silly had her swim, Ollie only barking at her for part of the time, taking time to search for snakes, his second favorite past time. We are not sure what he would do if he ever caught one - lets hope that never happens. As Silly was getting ready for the day I went out to check the flower pots and noticed something in the pool....one of our cute chipmunks had fallen in and drowned :(. This is a first for us, one that I hope never happens again. Sil and I headed up to the local Arboretum, lived here for 17 years and this would be my first visit. Science and bugs, the science of bugs, biology of trees, trees with bugs - all things that Silly loves. I took her to a small peace of heaven for her. There were small reminders in several places that spurned her on to tell me stories of her home in the valley, as our visit wore on I could visibly see her relax. The joy on her face radiated with her smile. Silly got her undergrad a year ago, travelled (we were lucky enough to meet up with her in Scotland, but that is another story), moved to the capital upon her return and got a job which is currently winding down. Some days it feels like our kids have known their paths for a while, they are kind of settled - now are grinding along. Silly has decisions to make and with her scientific mind - there is a process to be followed. I got to witness the process - it was wonderful. I was lucky enough to be abel to walk and talk, laugh and cry with this amazing young woman yesterday. As she was teaching me yesterday about bugs and their cocoons in trees and plants, I got to watch her shed her cocoon. It was AWESOME! While experiencing the pressures of young adulting, deciding on a job offer that came yesterday, logistics ...she was able to see the wonder in the world. Heart break if some seed didn’t land properly and root, a caterpillar that would not complete its metamorphosis, through all this kid glowed!
I think dear imaginary reader, that sometimes I get got up in grind, the things that didnt work and let myself I get bogged down. I feel heavy and shaky on the tightrope. They say everything happens for a reason. Yesterday I got to see that even in rocky times, pressure, tough decisions - there is a way to find sunshine and joy. Silly, thank you for taking time to smell the flowers with me yesterday. Keep growing kid, you got this. Well dear imaginary reader yesterdays event is behind me...and what an event it was. This will be a quick post today, just an update really. I ended up wearing a dress that I have had for a few years but had only worn a couple of times, I didn’t feel comfortable in it before. I paired it with a belt, a thing I also usually don’t wear. The dress felt comfy this time, and the belt well..I had to wear it at a whole new notch, 4 notches smaller than the last time I wore it. The fluff really is coming off!!! Not saying that I don’t need to loose more - just that progress is being made. I did speak to new people, hung with the old friends and the “kids”. Our house is a little quiet today, there are perhaps a few “headaches” and in my case full body ache, but not the head. Wine, water worked again! We danced our feet off. This is how many of our group feel today, I am proud of myself, it was a baby step backward and that’s ok. I know that I will question myself with regard to new situations and conversation in the future, I think that is only to be expected. None the less, I have had a small victory dear imaginary reader. Cheers to that!
|
Archives
May 2018
Categories |